"For of all sad words of tongue or pen....."

"For of all sad words of tongue or pen,
The saddest are these: "It might have been!"
from  the poem Maud Muller, by John Greenleaf Whittier

It's likely that you know that quote, likely that you've used it a time or two yourself.  I have, as you can plainly see.  It strikes mighty close to home for us.  It brings to mind the possibilites, or impossibilities, of how things might have been different if we'd only chosen this instead of that, or that instead of this, or wisdom instead of folly, right instead of wrong, better instead of  good, and best instead of merely better.  It's human to feel those pangs of regret, sadness, and even loss.  But I disagree with the poet's assessment.  To be honest, I think John Greenleaf Whittier was a fool.  For of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are most definitely not those.  At least not to me.

The saddest words of all come from a passage in the book of Mark, Chapter 5, and verse 17.  Jesus had just healed a man possessed by many demons.  A Legion of demons, for they were many.  This possessed man was dangerous.  He was frightening.  He was mad, crazy, psychotic.  He "wandered among the burial caves and in the hills, howling and cutting himself with sharp stones."  And Jesus cast the Legion of demons out of this poor soul and into a herd of pigs, who promptly ran off a cliff & into the lake.  A Miracle.  A Mercy.  A Healing.  A Purging.  A Blessing.

But the crowd of people didn't thank Jesus, or comfort & minister to the man He'd just delivered from a most pitiable state, or rejoice in that deliverance.  They didn't even gaze on in astonishment and wonder.  They asked Him to leave.  And they asked Him to leave them alone.

     "¹⁷ And the crowd began pleading with Jesus to go away and leave them alone."

Those are the saddest words of tongue or pen, made all the sadder by the fact that, when they asked, He complied.  He left.  So sad.  So heartbreaking.  They asked Him to leave.  And He left.

Have you ever asked Jesus to just go away?  Or have you asked Him to just leave you alone, just leave this one tiny little sin unchanged?  Sometimes it hurts to be healed.  Sometimes it hurts to give up a sin we've hidden and held close.  If sin weren't so tempting, we'd not be tempted by it.  I cannot speak for anyone but me.  I'll not presume to know your heart.  But you do.  As for me, I know that there have been times in my life when I asked Jesus to leave, and to leave me alone.  I'm heartbroken to write it, soulsick to admit it.  But I have, at times, wanted just a little less healing, just a little less pruning, just a little less Jesus in my life.  And I can attest to the fact that, when I've asked Him, He's left me alone.  That's the distance you feel when you know there's sin in your life that you're holding on to.  That's the loneliness you feel when you've created a spiritual ceiling to hide beneath, knowing that you cannot stand His gaze.  That's the shame you feel knowing that you have put whatever petty, putrid thing ahead of God, choosing some old secret sin over the healing touch of Jesus. 

It's not that the payment for those sins hasn't been made.  Jesus paid that price long ago, and we needn't try to pay it over and over.  We can't afford the cost.  But sin creates a barrier between us and God.  Period.  Thankfully, He forgives, and oh, how He loves.  Join me in praying that I'll be sensitive to His loving, healing, hands, and let Him change me and purify me in any and every way He sees fit.  And I'll pray the same for you.

God bless you! (And heal you.)

p.s.  Here's a link to a great Jason Gray song that goes along with this concept.
http://grooveshark.com/s/The+Cut/3BDT4L?src=5